Mother, comedian Jacki Kane gives parents TIME OUT

By Jillian Starr
The Portland Upside
December 2009

Photo by Deke Black

At the recent TIME OUT comedy show “Guess Who’s Messing Up Dinner,” Jacki Kane (top) worries her kids won’t know the meaning of a wildly dysfunctional holiday.

If Ellen DeGeneres’ and Steven Wright’s comedy had a baby, and the baby grew up to be a mother of two, it would be Jacki Kane. With self-deprecating humor and a big heart, she manages, produces and emcees “TIME OUT: The Mother of All Comedies,” a local show that invites others to take the stage and share in the grand comedy that is parenthood.

Last month at Northeast Portland’s Curious Comedy Theatre, Jacki joked about being a mom, a cougar, and growing up Catholic. Her comedy presence creates a comfortable, familiar atmosphere, like proudly watching your best friend perform. Welcoming six other mothers to the stage, it’s obvious she loves to share the spotlight with parents who see the laughter in their own lives.

Women like Nicole McKinney clearly agree that parenting requires humor. She joked about insurance policies for kids’ cell phones, asking the hilariously simple question “Did our moms ever call up State Farm to insure bikes and roller skates?”

Wendy Bax spoke of turning the food pyramid into a ranch-style house and Betsy Kauffman explained why Jewish people never see Bigfoot—“they would if he went to the half-yearly sale at Nordstrom’s!”

Looking at the theatre’s full house, it’s hard to believe TIME OUT started as scribbles on scraps of paper tucked absentmindedly throughout Jacki’s home. When the jokes outnumbered toddler crumbs, she debuted her new material during open mic at the family-friendly Airplay Cafe. A group of moms fell off the couch laughing, and at that moment she knew her honest comedy about child rearing resonated strongly with other parents. She immediately set up a meeting with the owner of the cafe and created her first TIME OUT show.

In January 2009, a crowd of about 80 parents buzzed with anticipation, wanting to laugh about the horrors of the holidays. The energized atmosphere—support group meets mom’s night out—allowed for regular moms to take the stage and speak comically about Thanksgiving Day childbirth, projectile turkey vomit and other holiday plans gone awry.

Since that first show, Jacki has performed monthly in Portland, Beaverton and Vancouver.

Shows feature monthly themes such as “Extreme Makeover Mom Edition” and “Honey I Shrunk My Libido.” Parent-comics joke freely about everything from diet plans to vasectomies. Local parenting businesses have lent support and performances have drawn standing-room-only audiences.

TIME OUT has attracted a diversity of performers including single moms, lesbian moms, moms with eight children, stay-at-home moms, entrepreneurs, dads and grandparents. Many performers are brand new to the stage while others have been professionally trained in acting, writing or stand-up. They go on stage because it’s a supportive way to joke about parenthood, because they’re trying to step back into a world of creativity and humor after having children, or because they welcome any excuse to get out of the house.

Kristina Martin, mother of three and former high school teacher, does the show to keep her sanity. She loves finding humor in all the nutty things that go hand-in-hand with parenting and she reports that surrounding herself with laughter makes her kids laugh, too.

Beren deMotier, mother of three and author of The Brides of March, finds the applause from the audience highly rewarding because her work as a writer is spent isolated, “hiding out in the basement trying to be funny.”

Debby Dodds, a professionally trained actress and improv artist, found TIME OUT to be the perfect way to step back into performing after her daughter was born.

Jacki herself logged three years of stand up comedy in Atlanta as well as writing comedy for television, advertising and radio before moving to Portland and slowing it all down to become a mother.

“After spending way too many hours wiping things, it’s really all about claiming something for yourself,” she says.

And what better way to self-nurture than to find the humor in life and make others happy?

Audience members find relief in laughing about the reality of parenthood. There are no airbrushed Hollywood parenting stories here, no nerve-wracking news reports, but rather a comical back-fence atmosphere of neighbor relating to neighbor, mama to mama.

One woman touched Jacki’s arm after the show and said, “Thank you for showing me there’s something more.”

In the isolation of homes, parents may not realize the bond they share with others, how common their own stories are. Fatigue, toddler tantrums, and the challenge of balancing roles within work, family and the home can throw anyone off kilter. No wonder straightforward parenting sitcoms like Roseanne, Everybody Loves Raymond and Modern Family are so popular. Many relate to the humor in everyday family situations and laughing is a great stress release.

Jacki might be a bit sadistic tackling two of the hardest jobs: mother and female stand-up comic. Yet she good-naturedly acknowledges the challenges. She laughs about the time she was introduced at a comedy club as “that middle-aged lady” by a man who was older and in desperate need of a man bra. And she readily admits that if there were a job application for parents, she definitely wouldn’t get hired.

Still, her two professions complement each other well. Her life is fodder for her comedy and her comedy is the creative outlet essential to her success as a mom. Hell-bent on turning TIME OUT into a show that continually fosters camaraderie among parents while not relying on thoughtless “blue” comedy, she’s determined to guide the show toward continued success.

Long term, Jacki wants to use the shows to assist moms in need as well as to establish a foundation for mothers who are struggling writers. Given all that Jacki can accomplish in a year, it will be exciting to watch TIME OUT prosper.

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For event schedules and more info about TIME OUT, see http://jackikane.wordpress.com or contact Jacki at 503-704-5737 or kane.jacki@gmail.com

Jillian Starr writes screenplays, poems and personal essays and is a proud member of TIME OUT’s board of directors. You can learn more about her at http://jillianstarr.com